Im back!

I watched The Godfather this morning before class.
I make it sound like something i quickly squeezed in before my morning lecture. But in all honesty, one can only appreciate The Godfather with full attention and care. My class didnt actually start until 2pm, and I had an early run. So what better way to spend my morning than breakfast in bed and a little Don Corleone.
The visit back home for christmas was great. People keep asking me how it was, and I respond "it was great, i saw the family, some friends, my GF. Partied a bit and went boarding". But the best part by far was seeing Jenny. I missed her so much.
You can imagine how I felt coming back. But really, I was more unsettled than anything. About the relationship that is.
Unsure, unclear.
We had a good talk one night. I asked her," do you love me?". She said "I dont know"...So I asked, "Do you feel like i'm someone you could love?". and she said "I dont know"... I dont know?! Are you kidding me?...Why am i waisting my time with an I dont know?
I keep asking myself that. But ultimately i realize that im looking for some reasurance, some security. But i shouldnt need to hear it when I can see it.
I fear im going to get my heart broken, i can see it coming.
till then, heres hoping